Monday, February 1, 2010

Hot Wife... Old Man?

(So much relevance)

There is an obvious pattern and trend that I am starting to notice when I hang out or mingle with what we as "Americans" call the upper-class. Why is it that when I go snowboarding on the weekends or spend my time in Park City surrounded by rich tourists, all I see seem to notice is the unit of hot wife, old man? I am starting to realize that investing in education, real estate, stocks or even pyramid scams (you know who you are friend('s)... and you have a lot of juice to shit your life away with now, don't ya? LOL) is not effective. The most effective way to reach fortune and fame is to hitch-up with a old man... Not just any old man of course, but an old rich man.

Hot wife seems happy as a clam with her half a million dollar ring blinding me in the eye. These hot mom's usually have one or two kids hanging all over their rumpelstiltskin looking daddy. I have come to realize with my recent observations that old man river did not realize that hot wife comes with the desire to still be a mother. Home
boy daddy is well past the age of rough housing or wrestling on the ground with kids, hell in some cases even bouncing a child on a knee is way out of their physical league. THESE MEN ARE OLD.

Now that you as the reader have created a mental picture, a picture that might include imagery of your grandpa with Angelina Jolie, I want to inform you that I am now taking applications for my rumplestiltskin... If you know any old dudes that are ready to hit the box sooner than later and are willing to leave me their fortune, let me know. I am experimenting with morals right now and want to find a positive relevance in possessing/lacking morals in my life. Thank you.


Danielle said...

I'm so happy you posted, I didn't even read your post!

Cheltz said...

Hahaha I love that you care sis. Maybe you should try reading it. I changed the background to a lighter purple so you would read mine again. Punk.

Alicia said...

You should check out the mail-order Vietnamese brides we have in our ward. I wish I was joking. There are two couples. And it is gross.

Lanea Sampson said...

Chelsea-I LOVE you! I'm sitting here laughing OUT LOUD! ps-thanks for the color change. The other purple was hard on my old lady eyes :)

Keeks said...