Monday, March 16, 2009

Lacking Coka~Cola in my Life

There has never been a harder loss to handle in my life. It has been minutes, hours, days, and weeks since my last sip. I literally think that the absence of Coke has made me go clinically crazy. I have no tolerance for stupid people (that even includes the attractive ones now), I'm way too honest with everyone and I sleep the most odd hours during the night and day. My daily clock is jacked up now because I have been a coke addict for over 7 years. I'd like to apologize for anyone who has shopped at my store since lent started, my close family and friends, students, and for anyone I've recently decided to hate. I blame the loss of caffeine and cola. My apologies also go out to everyone who has seen a drop in their soda sales since I stopped showing up with my 32 oz cup.

I apologize to the following:

*7 Eleven
*McDonalds
*Maverick
*Sonic- "Happy Hour" just isn't the same without me, I'm sure.
*Julie-I know you have offered me Coke like 6 times and I have rudely denied it. You're my only true friend, because you offer despite my stupid endeavours. You really love me.
*Katrina & Danielle, for leaving them in their addiction alone.
*Anyone who feels bad for drinking soda around me while we eat. (Drew! Go ahead and drink that coke in front of me)
*My mental health and happiness.
*My pants that no longer cup my ass so perfectly. You'll probably be replaced sucka's.
*And last, but definitely not least COKE. We'll meet again.

4 comments:

Alicia said...

Is it weird that I feel sad and frustrated that one of my own is not on the coke anymore? Come on Chels! Stop the madness!

Kat said...

You are weird. Who gives up coke for LENT? Your a goddamn MORMON.

Erin said...

i think i have taken over your addiction. except mine has become cherry coke! ever since the last part of my pregnancy, and it continues to get worse! its def an money sucker upper!

Ms. Dottie said...

If you stopped drinking coke then what do you mix your rum with? hahaha just kidding...a little